Fat Pat’s Return April/17/2000

[WebMistress]

Ode To Fat Pat's Return

Different personalities abound the Spirit Board, if you've read,
And most of those who post are know as 'Bucketheads'!
Some post often, while others post a little bit less,
Still others watch in silence, just so they might digest,
Information on fans, blowers and panhard bars,
And a myriad of subjects which help build our cars.

One who posts frequently is known as Fat Pat,
His information, as described, is never 'flat'.
From brake cylinders to carbs, the questions have been scattered,
But, to Fat Pat the subjects have really never mattered.
If he has knowledge, he's gonna give an answer,
Charging with truth like a mechanical information 'Lancer'!

His answers, as an arrow, seek out the 'Bull's Eye',
But, his bow is his 'puter', from which they do fly!
No matter what the question, I haven't seen him stumped,
Ranging from spark gaps to which Chevy heads are 'double-humped'!

There are 'extracurricular encounters', that take place on this board,
And one never knows what will come out of Fat Pat's 'gourd'!
Then there's that 'badminton' match between he and Fred,
The history of that, most of you have probably read.
The only thing they agree on, is that a T should be RED!
But, there seems to be something hidden that keeps this banter fed.

Maybe it's a lost wager that has someone upset,
The payoff's coming but, if it's gonna be paid off in regret,
There's gonna be flyin' cheeseburgers batted across that net,
And they're gonna bounce off some Coke trailers, on that you can bet!
And what about the root beer floats, how sloppy could that be?
I'm not sure that's anything we 'Bucketheads' should see!

Gradually we noticed that something was definitely wrong,
There had been no postings from Pat, for a period that was long.
Finally, someone entered the question, "Where's Fat Pat?"
Now we were all wondering, "Where's he at?"
Then came word that this mighty 'Buckethead' was down,
To post everyone's feelings, the image would have been a frown.

Then we learned it was PNEUMONIA that took down Pat,
It was as serious as a blow from a large baseball bat.
In their concern, 'Bucketheads' began posting words of concern,
All wishing a speedy recovery to hasten Fat Pat's Return!
Now, no proof linking cheeseburgers and pneumonia has been found,
But, this is also no illness with which you want to 'clown'.

Spirit board lost a lot of color while Fat Pat was gone,
Now he's back, once again singing his song.
But, we're now learning how serious was his hospital stay,
For, almost under six feet of ground, his body did lay.
And, although at home now, he's not completely well,
Back into his active ways he has evidently fell!

Pat, you gotta' give your body a chance to heal,
No matter how bad you wanna' get behind the wheel.
We want you here, drivin' and talkin' with us,
Instead of, 'up there', drivin' some heavenly bus!
Adopt the following, if you please,
So that the rest of us can breathe with ease!
"NOW'S THE BEST TIME TO REST YOUR BOD',
SO YOU'LL BE AROUND TO DRIVE YOUR ROD!"

If one person dropped off the board, you'd think nobody would see,
This story shows how important each one of us 'Bucketheads' must be.
We truly are a family linked together with our 'Little Ol' Cars',
Now look what we've found within, certain 'Personality Stars'.

So, Fat Pat, may your mend be total and complete,
Wishes for the same, on this board have been replete.
Please take the advice that is freely written above,
We don't want to be readin' over a mound of dirt about 'How you were loved'!
But, if you're gonna bypass the advice, I'm gonna tell you something you'll dread,
Another fella's petitioned for your spot on the board, he said his name was Fred!

Herman T. Quackenbush 4/17/2000
(aka T-Pilot with Pups)
(aka John Eplen)